What is this light that disturbs the peace?
Illuminating shadow without clarity
Disturbing ideas half-understood
and a dark, unnamed thing slithers, uncoils
Uncomfortable in the sudden cold, in unfamiliar light.
No questions prod, no answers hurt
Just this strange glow that lights the comfortable dark.
The dark is simple, unchallenged and enfolding.
It welcomes strange silences, holds them unquestioned.
This light, though-
It creeps out from somewhere unknown
Unwanted, distasteful
A cold, watery, brittle light-
Stretching grasping fingers
Towards truths better left in the dark.
Friday, June 12, 2009
Friday, June 05, 2009
Connections
Tuesday morning, 2 a.m
14409735862 : We are at the ICU.
Through sleep, she registers this number that looks like home.
"Mom, I just got this text message. Are you guys okay?"
"We're fine, what message are you talking about?"
14409735862 : Please come, she doesn't have much time left. She's asking for you.
The phone rings and rings with no replies, her call ends in a text message and voicemail.
14409735862 : She didn't make it, why wouldn't you come see her?
When he calls, they talk. "I'm so sorry for your loss. Whoever you are, whatever she meant to you, I hope you find peace. I wish you'd seen my messages last night and called the right person instead of me."
14409735862 : We are at the ICU.
Through sleep, she registers this number that looks like home.
"Mom, I just got this text message. Are you guys okay?"
"We're fine, what message are you talking about?"
14409735862 : Please come, she doesn't have much time left. She's asking for you.
The phone rings and rings with no replies, her call ends in a text message and voicemail.
14409735862 : She didn't make it, why wouldn't you come see her?
When he calls, they talk. "I'm so sorry for your loss. Whoever you are, whatever she meant to you, I hope you find peace. I wish you'd seen my messages last night and called the right person instead of me."
Thursday, June 04, 2009
Faith (f)or science
Most of life's conundrums are usually covered by the blanket answers of bhakti - "Have faith, He solves all problems in his own time." "God sees the truth, but waits."
Simple answers, requiring nothing more from me than that I smile beatifically at an idol, and ask an inanimate object to fix all my troubles.
Don't get me wrong- I do believe in a higher spirit, a universal energy that can guide and protect and solve all problems. I believe in places of power, where eons of energy lie stored, and if the connections are strong enough, each of us can reach those stores. I just don't buy into the idea that a shiny sticker of a goddess on my computer will give me greater wisdom. So what would you do, if your mentor told you to have faith in God, for he solves all problems and will give you your due?
The situation is a simple one, something we've all faced to some extent since we started school. A copies the work that B did, and passes it off as his own. Not just that, he's quite nice about it, telling B- look, we can say we did this project together, and you can share the credit.
If it were only a question of A and B, I would wage righteous crusades and make sure B got his due. The realization that morality is so much easier in the third person makes me cringe.
But this is my work, three years of research. I fought tooth and nail to prove my hypothesis, worked on a single protocol for more than a year, spent endless nights writing it all up. Through qualifiers and exams and conferences I slaved over it, and came close to quitting my Ph.D over this project. This isn't a grade on a class project at stake, it's a lot of research money, the careers of several people, possible collaborations.
Should I stick up for myself, demand my due- "Our group did the work, we should get the credit and screw the others"? Or should I choose a middle road, share the credit and diminish the value of everything that we did? Doesn't that in some cosmic way condone the wrong, say that it's acceptable to copy and demand credit for it?
What would you do, if you were me?
Simple answers, requiring nothing more from me than that I smile beatifically at an idol, and ask an inanimate object to fix all my troubles.
Don't get me wrong- I do believe in a higher spirit, a universal energy that can guide and protect and solve all problems. I believe in places of power, where eons of energy lie stored, and if the connections are strong enough, each of us can reach those stores. I just don't buy into the idea that a shiny sticker of a goddess on my computer will give me greater wisdom. So what would you do, if your mentor told you to have faith in God, for he solves all problems and will give you your due?
The situation is a simple one, something we've all faced to some extent since we started school. A copies the work that B did, and passes it off as his own. Not just that, he's quite nice about it, telling B- look, we can say we did this project together, and you can share the credit.
If it were only a question of A and B, I would wage righteous crusades and make sure B got his due. The realization that morality is so much easier in the third person makes me cringe.
But this is my work, three years of research. I fought tooth and nail to prove my hypothesis, worked on a single protocol for more than a year, spent endless nights writing it all up. Through qualifiers and exams and conferences I slaved over it, and came close to quitting my Ph.D over this project. This isn't a grade on a class project at stake, it's a lot of research money, the careers of several people, possible collaborations.
Should I stick up for myself, demand my due- "Our group did the work, we should get the credit and screw the others"? Or should I choose a middle road, share the credit and diminish the value of everything that we did? Doesn't that in some cosmic way condone the wrong, say that it's acceptable to copy and demand credit for it?
What would you do, if you were me?
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